Hole in my Soul

Today I drove to Laurel to meet a client and afterwards, since I was in the area, I went to a lake I used to ride to on my motorcycle. I didn't realize how much I would miss the place, it's changed a bit since I was last there.

I began to reminisce about all the little day trips I used to make to this lake. My bike and me. Somewhere inside me there is something missing. The lake is still beautiful but within me I missed the ride.

Back when my bike was running and I lived in Laurel Mississippi I would ride out to the lake just to clear my head, explore ideas and do a little skywatching. It was peaceful and I would center myself. The feeling of balance I would get from the journey to the lake and back kept me going. Today I really missed it.

Today I had to face the hole in my soul.

There is something about a motorcycle ride that gets in your blood. It's not the rev of the engine or the status of being the owner. It's the ride. A friend once said the wind blows all of your troubles away and he was right. There is nothing to compare to a pleasant day on your bike.

I guess I didn't realize how much a part of me riding was, and how much is missing now without it. I haven't ridden since 2008 and it's taking a toll on my soul...



It's like a part of me is no longer here. I'm happy, but still that inner "biker" is restless. I've come to realize that I define myself two ways. A Videographer (my job) and a Biker (my inner self). One complements the other. They are both me and I am both them.

By "Biker" I don't mean some Harley Guy out to bust up a bar. That is not what it's all about. It's about the peace and serenity I got from the ride. And it's that serenity that I'm missing. Perhaps I should say I am a "rider?"

I'm a wind surfer and I miss the wind. I miss the joy and peace of gliding down some lonely road just me, the bike and the sky above me. I miss the places I would visit and the experiences from those destinations and life journeys. I miss the freedom, the road and the ride.

So I'm setting a goal.

Get another bike and get back on the road. :)